Matt Escapes Long Arm of Law: Free To Bong

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Matt Leinart will not be charged with funneling alcohol to minors....even though there may be proof (as in 12 proof) to the contrary.

Pictures of Leinart surfaced earlier this week. At least Matty boy didn't use his million dollar throwing arm to deliver a 12 ounce shot to the face -- the face of what appears to be a drunk chick. The question, is the beer bong-ee underage? Drinking age in Arizona is 21.

The Maricopa County Sheriff's office tells TMZ they are not investigating. They just don't wanna know if Matt's rat can legally drink. The Sheriff says pictures aren't enough to charge someone with a crime. Well, they could talk to the chicks...we're just sayin'.

Fifth Time's a Charm -- NFL Convict Busted Again

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Chris Henry of the Cincinnati Bengals is determined to flush his NFL career down the toilet.

The 24-year-old wide receiver -- who was arrested a whopping four times in a 14-month span and suspended for half of last season by the NFL -- turned himself into police yesterday after an 18-year-old guy accused Henry of hitting him in the face and breaking his car window with a beer bottle.

A spokesman for the team said they are aware of the incident, but had no comment. Henry's agent said Henry had a different account of what went down, but wouldn't say more.

UPDATE: Mission accomplished -- the Bengals have cut Chris Henry. Bengals president Mike Brown said in a statement, "Chris Henry has forfeited his opportunity to pursue a career with the Bengals. His conduct can no longer be tolerated."

Barry Bonds: One Hit Wonder

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While outside STK last night, indicted teamless MLB player Barry Bonds was so worried he'd wind up on YouTube that he wouldn't answer any questions -- only mustering up "Hi, TMZ" over and over.

It's not like we brought up any of that steroid scandal stuff or anything.

Coach to Matt: Pros Before Hos

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After checking out his superstar QB in action on the 'net yesterday, Arizona Cardinals head coach Ken Whisenhunt did a little playa hatin' of his own, saying he was "disappointed" in Leinart's behavior.

Hey coach -- he's a good-looking, 24-year-old, multi-millionaire! What did you expect!? If you want a QB that stays away from the tail, draft someone fugly!

Bundchen or Buncha Skanks!?

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Ya got two pretty boy NFL quarterback single dads, who could practically have any woman they want. But while Tom Brady has basically settled down with supermodel Gisele Bundchen, Matt Leinart's living it up -- four chicks at a time!

So the question, and really think this one through -- Whose cleats would you rather be in? Leinart's, where you get to booze with a hot tub full of random skeezers? Or Brady's, where you spend all your time as Gisele's bitch?

Choose wisely, Grasshopper.

Dorothy Hamill 'Memba Her?!

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In 1976, Dorothy Hamill -- and her hairstyle -- became famous for winning the gold medal in women's figure skating at the Innsbruck Olympic Games. Guess what she looks like now!

Brady Wusses Out With Gisie, Again

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Tom has been whipped into a total man-puppy since Gisele strutted into his life.

Check out Tom slumming it at an L.A. Whole Foods. All it took for him to be domesticated was a supermodel -- too bad it wasn't inspired by the mother of his child!

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Pap Makes Gigantic Fumble

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Ryan Phillippe was surprisingly quiet when one pap pressed him about possibly pregnant girlfriend Abbie Cornish at LAX.

Oh right, that's because the photog was asking TOM BRADY that question ... who was there with Gisele Bundchen.

Leinart to Skeezer: Suck This, Baby

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Rather than hang with his hot girlfriend (as in Nick Lachey and Vanessa Minnillo) or his young son (as in Matt Leinart with his son Cole), it's a lot more fun to hang with hot Arizona chicks -- youngins at that.

Nik Richie at the TheDirty.com got these photos of the two studs hanging hot tub-side at Matt's place in Arizona over the weekend, where the Cardinals QB found a wide open receiver ... for his beer bong.

Well, if he ever gets cut from the team, at least he has a future in tailgating.

Dude! You Don't Pee On the Dance Floor!!

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Kenyatta Jones has some serious moves on the dance floor. They're a pisser!

The former Redskin and Patriots player, who has now been relegated to the Arena Football League, was busted after cops say he tried to urinate on the dance floor at some place called The Blue Martini in Tampa, Fla. Toot toot!

As security and off-duty cops tried to escort Jones out of the club, he tried to get back inside and shoved an officer up against a door. That's when they tazed him and hauled him off to the pokey!

He was charged with battery on a law enforcement officer, obstruction and trespassing.

Talk about an offensive tackle.

Piazza -- Lookin' For Work in All the Wrong Places

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Anyone in the market for a 39-year-old catcher? Mike Piazza needs a job!

The "unemployed" former Dodger/Marlin/Met/Padre/Athletic-turned-free agent didn't know what team he'd be playing for next -- but he can't be struggling that badly, Madeo ain't cheap!

Former Pro Basketballer Arrested for Traveling

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TMZ has learned Isaiah Rider was busted last night for grand theft auto.

Police sources say Rider, who played the for the Timberwolves and the Lakers, was driving through skid row in L.A. at 2:30 this morning when he failed to stop at the limit line at an intersection -- you would think the guy would know something about the whole out of bounds thing.

Anywho, cops ran the plates and found the 2001 Chevy Monte Carlo was hot, so the LAPD popped him for grand theft auto (and crossing a limit line) and he was booked on $25,000 bail.

BTdubs, Rider was arrested earlier this month for possession of narcotics and evading a cop.

In 2006, he was also busted for kidnapping. He pled guilty to lesser charges, including felony cocaine possession. He was sentenced to seven months in jail and was placed on three years probation. Alley-oops.

Mike Bibby: Waah! Gimme Back My Ride! Waaah!

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NBA baller Mike Bibby is suing an automotive customization business that he says has his ride -- and won't give it back!

In the lawsuit, Bibby claims 212 Motoring told him they would pimp out his 1973 Chevy Caprice for free. Why free? Because the auto shop was trying to score a reality show tricking out old school cars -- and Bibby's was the perfect vehicle to feature on the program.

WWE Puts the Squeeze on Man Nipples

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Nipplegate 2008 has broken out in Florida! Wrestlers John Cena, Triple H, Randy Orton and Big Show are all proudly baring their nipple-free chests on a huge banner in downtown Orlando. Wait, what?

City officials met with some WWE suits to figure out how to keep the wrestling poster from looking "too provocative." The outcome - the WWE slammed, er, airbrushed the nipples into oblivion. Billboard malfunction!

More of Magic to Love

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NBA superstar Earvin "Magic" Johnson in Hawaii yesterday, vacationing with the fam and looking healthy.

He was always known for larger-than-life smile. Now ...

Spygate 2: Bill Beli-check's Out Some Booty

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New England Patriots' skipper, Bill Belichick, had the second-best seat in the house at a University of Florida basketball game on Wednesday.

That Bill ... always working a tight end.

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